Cal's Nineteenth

I've spent the better part of my adult life studying the life and teachings of Jesus Christ. The most transformative parts of my study have been as I have sought to better understand the character of Christ. In fact, one of my favorite addresses reasoning what this entails came from David A Bednar in an address he gave titled, "The Character of Christ". After making his case through scriptural accounts of Christ's suffering, Bednar posits, "Throughout His mortal ministry, and especially during the events leading up to and including the atoning sacrifice, the Savior of the world turned outward--when the natural man or woman in any of us would have been self-centered and focused inward." 

My Calvin is serving a mission right now. Sometimes we mistakenly say that he is serving a mission 'for our church'. More correctly I believe it might be stated that He is serving a mission 'for others'. He is serving a mission to share with others the character of Christ and how following Him will improve a life, improve relationships, and ultimately bring anyone who desires it, closer to God. In step with Bednar's thoughts it is ironic that to do this Cal would need to turn outward when he most wanted to turn inward.

Calvin was anxious and excited to go the weeks leading up to his departure and yet as the night drew close that he would leave, home seemed to feel increasingly comfortable and his family gathered round produced some angst and reluctance to leave. Even at the gate he expressed to me in a hug that he really didn't want to leave. Not that he didn't want to serve. Not that he didn't want to share this message. But that his heart didn't want to leave behind all of the wonderful things home and family provides. A few more private words were exchanged and then he turned resolved in his next steps.

We miss him. He is such a joy to be with and has been the best son. Last night I fell asleep thinking about him. Today is his birthday. His birthday package will not arrive on time and my heart felt a little sad that he would spend this birthday without his mother's love and our eight second hug or at the very least a small package from home. I finally fell asleep. Sometime around 4am I awoke to a one word thought. The word was "willing". The word permeated my mind for the better part of an hour with thoughts of my boy, thoughts from this week's 9/11 day services and memorials and thoughts on the character of Jesus Christ. 

There is no growth or change without first offering our will. There is no ministry to others without offering our own will. There is no act of heroism or grand rescue without setting aside our own comfort and our own will. Jesus Christ's life from our earliest understanding of it taught us everything about developing His character through His own 'willingness' to sacrifice. His own journey began through a sacrifice of will. It is His pattern for a happy and joyful life. It is the pattern for joyful relationships. It is the pattern for peace. It is the pattern for rescue. "Not my will, but Thine."

Today I share this little piece of my heart. One that perhaps I might protect on another day. But today's my boy's birthday. And as He has been so willing to offer all that he has right now to share who Jesus Christ is so that it can bless the lives of others, so shall I. 

This is my small birthday gift to him because I love him so much. Today I will join him in offering this message to any who are seeking greater peace and joy in their life.

Maybe today if you find yourself thinking of Cal or Jesus, perhaps you will find a way to reach outward when your desire is to turn inward. Perhaps you will find a moment to set aside your will to bless the life of someone else. It is truly the happiest way to live.

Maybe you could even email him a message of what you did today to put a smile on his face at calvin.hixon@missionary.org 

Happy Birthday my Cal! I love you so much!